Blank Sheet of Paper

Me too .

There's always something more you can say. That you want to say.

I'm too young to be this disheartened when my plans completely fall through. It never seems to fail though, I can plan a whole day (okay, a handful of hours in my evening), it will go wonderfully in my mind, and then when the time comes... *plunk* Nope, not gonna happen that way. Not even a little. - -Is that fair? Now I realize that plans change sometimes, possibly even the better half of the time, but... C'mon... It's two weeks until my birthday... Shouldn't I get a little leeway with this?

My birthday is coming up quick. Two weeks. I can't believe it myself, I mean, I remember teasing you before I started school, asking what you were going to get me. Ha, your answer now is relatively the same as it was then, just a little more mysterious. Truth be told, a part of me just wants to skip it, my birthday, I mean. It has nothing to do with being a year older, I've accepted that fact already, that my youth is slowly slipping away, but instead I admit that I'm afraid my birthday will bring back a stream of not-so-pleasant memories from a year ago. It may seem silly, it probably is silly, but the thought is still there, that 'What If?' Now I admit it's not true, I don't actually believe it, but I also didn't believe in a lot of things a year ago, and I was ultimately surprised. It's not that I don't look forward to the occasion holistically either, it's just that I wish this year won't leave me another year older and more b